Changes....

I just got finished reading some of Emeth's posts on her blogs and what she wrote about missing her brothers resonated with me deeply.

This past week as I was finishing up my course on biokinesionics, my husband took seven of our children on a camping trip for a couple of days. I had the house to myself with only sweet Elodie for company. I knew I wouldn't enjoy being by myself so I invited a young couple who are on the course with me and who were also from out of town. We had a wonderful meal together and really enjoyed getting to know one another.

Tuesday, I managed to get home late, but the house was eerily silent. It wasn't too bad at first, but when it came time for bed, it was very lonely going around and locking up and shutting off the lights without having anyone in the house besides me and Elodie and a few mice in my basement. And this is a foretaste of the future when my children are grown and gone. I don't like it.

At times I sigh over the lack of time to sit and read uninterrupted for a few minutes. There always seems to be a crisis brewing somewhere. But then I go to the library and find I can't read at all because NO ONE interrupts me. How did this happen?

I confess to stressing out today and wishing I could run away when the kids got noisy and started squabbling over silly things. I need to remember the silence and how little I liked it and be thankful at least that they are still here for now.

One thing I wish my children would learn is how to appreciate this time in their life with their siblings. Once they are grown and gone, they will never be living with one another like this again. The shared history is one of the most important ingredients of memories and companionship. This is a good time of life if they would only recognize it. Responsibilities and cares are few. Times of fun are many.

I miss my sister. She was only 16 when I got married and left home for good. We have never lived in the same province since then and only see each other every few years. We were never close as children. There was too much jealously on my part over the perceived favoritism of my mother towards her, and too much temptation to tease me into a frenzy on her part. But since then we have become better friends. She called me the other day for some help and encouragement that she didn't think she could get from anyone else. It was truly a blessing to give comfort to one who is not only my sibling, but also my sister in Christ.