A Womanly Woman

I am the fountain of affection

I'm the instrument of joy

And to keep the good times rollin'

I'm the girl; I'm the girl

[with apologies to Great Big Sea for a bit of poetic license]

This has been quite the summer for me so far. I have experienced great joys and great trials all in the space of a few short weeks and in the end, I am been the recipient of new freedom in Christ.

Not that long ago I was reading one of Dorothy Sayer's novels and she described Miss Climpson, an old maid by circumstance and not by desire, to be a "womanly woman." That phrase, "womanly woman" is the epitome of what I want to become.

I have strongly resisted being termed a "Prairie Muffin." Even though "Prairie Muffin" has been defined to be a broad range of women of all sorts and styles who are endeavoring to lead a godly life in Christ, for me it always conjurs up the image of frumpy denim jumpers or frilly calico dresses and that has never been my style. I am more of the Bohemian hippy persuasion and my native clothing is indian muslin, birkenstocks, blue jeans, and hemp necklaces. I think I also have the personality to match that style, though I admit, I can be chameleon like and dress and act to suit my surroundings, whether it is as a corporate business woman or a prim and proper homebody and momma.

Part of who I am is the strong affection that I often feel welling up in me for people. I have often kept a lid on this for various reasons. For one thing, it can be embarrassing to the recipients of the affection if they aren't the demonstrative types. For another, as a friend pointed out, our culture presses everything in the "sex and romance" mold and leaves little room for anything else. This can be very inhibiting. If you love someone of the opposite gender who isn't your spouse, it is supposed that you are suffering from a bad case of lust, especially if they are around your age; and if you love someone of the same gender, you must have latent homosexual tendencies, or so it seems to go. Sexuality gets compressed and brought down to the lowest common denominator of the sex drive, when in reality it is supposed to be the screen through which we express ourselves. A woman's sexuality is not limited to the act of intimacy with her mate; it is expressed in bearing and nurturing children and in making a home. It is doing the practical things needful to make a sick mate or child comfortable. It is cheerfully submitting to the Lord in her place and station, knowing that even if the world views it with disdain, she still is as rare as a ruby if she does it all unto the Lord.

If a woman is not married and has no children, she is still a sexual being who is free to express this in brotherly or sisterly love for the Brethren and in fulfilling a calling. It is expressed in dressing modestly and in behaving modestly and yet doesn't hide itself in frumpy clothing, unkempt hair, or skin that is untended. A womanly woman is a well-tended and orderly garden filled with beautiful flowers that spring from within through the sanctification of the Holy Spirit.

A godly, womanly woman is one who can love strongly, deeply, and freely. I am finding more and more, that those I love and am drawn to, are people whom I love for their personalities. Their gender is certainly part of it, but only a small part. It is the soul that I have come to love. How do I know it is a godly love? Love wants the best for the beloved, and one of the highest expressions of love is the desire to assit the beloved Heavenwards to glorifying and enjoying God forever.

One of the glories of Heaven will be the unrestricted pleasure of being able to freely love all there, regardless of gender, and know that it is a holy love untainted by sin, and not suspect in the eyes of others.

Now, I am off to express my womanly nature by grocery shopping with the kids and taking them to visit their sick papa in the hospital. Joy upon joy!